Signs !!

Colonialgirl

Hawkeye
Joined
Dec 7, 2008
Messages
8,822
City & State/Province
Wesley Chapel, Florida
A Sign in a shoe repair store in Vancouver reads:
We will heel you
We will save your sole
We will even dye for you

A Sign on a blinds and curtain truck:
“Blind man driving.”

A Sign over a Gynecologist's Office:
"Dr. Jones, at your cervix.”

In a Podiatrist's office:
"Time wounds all heels.”

On a Septic Tank Truck:
"Yesterday's Meals on Wheels

At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what you're looking for,
You've come to the right place.”

On a Plumber's truck:
"We repair what your husband fixed.”

On another Plumber's truck:
"Don't sleep with a drip. Call your plumber.”

At a Tire Shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout.”

On an Electrician's truck:
"Let us remove your shorts.”

In a Non-smoking Area:
"If we see smoke, we will assume you are on fire,
and will take appropriate action.”

On a Maternity Room door:
"Push. Push. Push.”

At a Car Dealership:
"The best way to get back on your feet - miss a car payment.”

Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary. We hear you coming.”

In a Veterinarian's waiting room:
"Be back in 5 minutes. Sit! Stay!”

At the Electric Company:
"We would be delighted if you send in your payment on time.
However, if you don't, YOU will be de-lighted.”

In a Restaurant window:
"Don't stand there and be hungry; come on in and get fed up.”

In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully. We'll wait.”

At a Propane Filling Station:
"Thank Heaven for little grills.”

In a Chicago Radiator Shop:
"Best place in town to take a leak.”

Saving the best for last…

Sign on the back of another Septic Tank Truck:
"Caution - This Truck is full of Political Promises"
 
If I may add one:

Sign on the front doors of a motel in Texas:

"These doors locked at 11:00 p.m.

After that time use front window."


Bob Wright
 
When I lived in Ketchikan the garbage trucks all had this sign on them:
"Satisfaction guaranteed or double your garbage back."
I never heard of anyone in town complaining.
 
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I remember a sign when I was a kid in Oklahoma where we stopped at a country restaurant and gas station. It read, "EAT and Get Gas".
 
Garbage trucks in Broward County, FL, (Ft. Lauderdale) used to have signs that sad "Free Snow Removal" and "We Cater Weddings".
 
Rancher Will said:
I remember a sign when I was a kid in Oklahoma where we stopped at a country restaurant and gas station. It read, "EAT and Get Gas".

Will, those were abundant in the midwest. The usual format was the words "eat" and "gas" arranged with the "eat" horizontal and the "gas" vertical, intersecting at and sharing the "A" . . . the neon letters alternated between illuminating the "eat" and the "gas".

Thus . . . EAT . . . GAS . . . EAT . . . GAS . . .EAT . . . GAS . . . etc.

From the days of BURMA-SHAVE . . .

:) :) :)
 
Sign at a small radiator repair shop

Joes Radiator Repair
Best place in town to take a leak.
 
There used to be a brake shop in West Palm Beach right at the end of Broadway. Big sign on the door. "If you can't stop, aim for the door."
 
They have the "TANK HEAVEN FOR LITTLE GRILLS" sign out in front of the Suburban Propane store on Franklin in Boise. I'm sure it's used elsewhere, too.
 

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