Polish Sausage

[Wyandot Jim]

Well,
I guess now that everybody has to be PC you don't hear these anymore.


A customer asked, "In what aisle can I find the Polish sausage?"

The clerk asks, "Are you Polish?"




The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes, I am. But let me ask you something.

If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?




Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?




Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog, would you ask me if I was Jewish?



Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?




Or if I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"




The clerk says, "No, I probably wouldn't."




The guy says, "Well then, because I asked for Polish sausage, why did you ask me if I'm Polish?"




The clerk replied, "Because you're in Home Depot."

 

[737tdi]

:lol: :lol: :lol:

 

[sfhogman]

Did. Not. See. That. Coming....

 

[FastEd]

NYUK! NYUK!

 

[graygun]

dat's da wurst

 

[ronto]

Just a few more "dumb" Poles: Chopin, Copernicus, Madame Curie, Catherine The Great, Jan Sobieski (turned back the Muslim invasion of Europe at the Battle of Vienna-1683).

 

[bogus bill]

I loved it! I got in trouble several times at work telling polish jokes. Once I was telling one and another guy was standing there and warned me I better not tell any Greek jokes. I couldnt resist. I said, one last one. This Greek and Polish guy married and had a kid. Know what they named him? NO! What? Zorba the dumb xxxx! He almost run me over!
Know why they spell Polish and Polish the same? No!
They dont know ---- from shineola!
Once these two Polish hunters got lost. One told the other two shoot three times as he heard that was the signal to use. He did and nothing happened. His buddy told him to try again. Nothing happened. His buddy said shoot again! His partner says I cant. I am out of arrows!
I think I met the same pair hunting once. They were pulling a nice big buck they had shot out of the woods and were having a lot of difficulty. They complained the antlers were hooking on brush. I said well, pull him by the hind legs. They told me they werent headed that direction.
Keep them coming. Being PC aint no fun!

 

[bogus bill]

Know how ---- sounds when it hits the fan? Pullock, Pullock ----

 

[Jimbo357mag]

My Grandfather's name was Boleslaw Mincheski but we just called him Frank. Quite a few Boleslaws in Polish history.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Boleslaw_(given_name)

 

[toysoldier]

My wife is blonde and Polish. Kinda limits the jokes I can tell.

 

[Wyandot Jim]

My wife is blonde and Polish. Kinda limits the jokes I can tell.

You're screwed

 

[Colonialgirl]

Well,
I guess now that everybody has to be PC you don't hear these anymore.


A customer asked, "In what aisle can I find the Polish sausage?"

The clerk asks, "Are you Polish?"




The guy, clearly offended, says, "Yes, I am. But let me ask you something.

If I had asked for Italian sausage, would you ask me if I was Italian?




Or if I had asked for German Bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?




Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog, would you ask me if I was Jewish?



Or if I had asked for a Taco, would you ask if I was Mexican?




Or if I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"




The clerk says, "No, I probably wouldn't."




The guy says, "Well then, because I asked for Polish sausage, why did you ask me if I'm Polish?"




The clerk replied, "Because you're in Home Depot."

I had a boss for a while that WAS Polish and he LOVED POLISH jokes; I use to collect them while making calls at the Sears stores just to spring them on him when I got back to the Lab.
I bet this one would have had him in stitches !!

 

[bogus bill]

I worked with a close friend that was Polish. He told me some of the best ones! I worked with another friend that was Italian. One night we checked in and I innocently asked him how did your day go? He blew up at me!
Same guy, we were checking in and somehow he told how his mother was a poor immigrant, had to work hard when she got here and he was born in a artichoke patch. Another friend looked over and told him, Oh? She arterchoked ya!
My dad was German. If he were alive he would be over a hundred. Dad`s folks both came from Europe, German homesteaders that came from what is now the Ukraine.
From what dad said there was a LOT of prejudice between the Germans and Poles when he was a kid in Wisconsin. Dad came from a huge family as his father had lost his first wife young and was left with 6 kids. He almost instantly married my grandma that was a dozen years younger. They were from the same area of Volhynia (now the Ukraine). She had just lost her husband over there and had just come to America with one young son. They married after about one date and dad was the first of 10 kids! That`s seventeen!
That part of Wisconsin was almost all Polish or German. Dad said grandpa sent him and uncle John to town for something with a team and wagon. John was about 8 years older than dad and it sounds like dad was only about seven at the time. Guess John was 14 or 15. A gang of Polish town kids ran alongside of the wagon pelting them with stones. Uncle John horse whipped them off and one died!
John never went to jail and it sounds like there wasn't a trial nor law suite! Dad said grandpa warned him to not marry a polish girl nor a Catholic. Ironically, a number did but not until grandpa died. I dont think many people know that there was so much prejudice like that prior to world war two. When the subject is brought up we only tend to think it was black/white back then.

 

[stevemb]

Am half Pole. Lost a great uncle in WW1 to german armor. Still enjoy the jokes, Poles have thick skin. My Sis married into a family that got more for the old family recipe(kielbasa) than they did for the deli when they sold out. My wife's family has a recipe they are closely guarding too.

 

[Merle1948]

My wife is blonde and Polish. Kinda limits the jokes I can tell.

You're screwed

Naw, just tell them slow so you don't have to repeat them.... :mrgreen:

 

[Wyandot Jim]

OHhhhh by the way my favorite Uncle is a Pollock. Living in the North and around my Uncle I got to hear a lot of Pollock jokes. When I moved to Texas in 62 they had the same jokes but were about Aggies.

 

[Merle1948]

OHhhhh by the way my favorite Uncle is a Pollock. Living in the North and around my Uncle I got to hear a lot of Pollock jokes. When I moved to Texas in 62 they had the same jokes but were about Aggies.

Time honored tradition - take a good joke & modify it to suit the current crowd.... :lol:

 

[Rick Courtright]

My wife is blonde and Polish. Kinda limits the jokes I can tell.

Hi,

Are you a glass half empty kinda person? That looks like the proverbial target rich environment to me! (There's no need to ask why I'm single, huh?)

Rick C

 

[ronto]

Am half Pole. Lost a great uncle in WW1 to german armor. Still enjoy the jokes, Poles have thick skin. My Sis married into a family that got more for the old family recipe(kielbasa) than they did for the deli when they sold out. My wife's family has a recipe they are closely guarding too.

Living between Germany and Russia you have to have a "thick skin".

 

[Tom W]

My grandfather was conscripted into the Russian army, just by living close to the border. All of my grandparents "came over on the boat" in the early '20's....from Poland.

 

[volshooter]

Growing up I heard a lot of Pollock jokes. Most funny but I never met any dumb Polls. Just hard working sturdy folk. I never took to heart that they were dumb, just the butt of jokes. Ya know, them folks are fine cooks.
Much better Redneck jokes out there and none offend me, their just jokes

 

[turd]

WJ, the joke is great, and you can put any ethnic group into it you wish. I'm 50/50 Dutch/German, so I read it as being a dumb Dutchman, and we all know that ain't true. :mrgreen: