Thoughts on Being a Senior

Colonialgirl

Hawkeye
Joined
Dec 7, 2008
Messages
8,824
City & State/Province
Wesley Chapel, Florida
Most Seniors never get enough exercise. In His wisdom God decreed that seniors become forgetful so they would have to search for their glasses, keys and other things, thus doing more walking. And God looked down and saw that it was good.

Then God saw there was another need. In His wisdom He made seniors lose coordination so they would drop things requiring them to bend, reach & stretch. And God looked down and saw that it was good.

Then God considered the function of bladders and decided seniors would have additional calls of nature requiring more trips to the bathroom, thus providing more exercise. God looked down and saw that it was good.

So if you find as you age, you are getting up and down more, remember it’s God’s will. It is all in your best interest even though you mutter under your breath.

Nine Important Facts To Remember As We Grow Older....

#9 Death is the number 1 killer in the world.

#8 Life is sexually transmitted.

#7 Good health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

#6 Men have 2 motivations: hunger and hanky panky, and they can't tell them apart. If you see a gleam in his eyes, make him a sandwich.

#5 Give a person a fish and you feed them for a day. Teach a person to use the Internet and they won't bother you for weeks, months, maybe years unless you give them your email address.

#4 Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in the hospital, dying of nothing.

#3 All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism.

#2 In the 60's, people took LSD to make the world weird. Now the world is weird, and people take Prozac to make it normal.

#1 Life is like a jar of jalapeno peppers. What you do today may be a burning issue tomorrow.


Feel free to share this wisdom with others while I go to the bathroom :oops: :oops:
:roll: :roll: :lol: :lol: :wink:
 
Conversely consider the alternative.....
The hardest part of growing old is that you have to grow up.
 
29aholic said:
I find that now I am a senior of sorts I can buy multivitamins in non-childproof containers

Some of my prescriptions I get from Walmart. I have the option of Childproof caps or I can turn the cap over and go non-childproof. I tried going non Childproof. I changed back to the Childproof, as they are easier and quicker to get into. :mrgreen:
 
Maturity is the ability to do a job whether or not you
are supervised and to carry money without spending it.

The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in line for.

Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I want people
to know "why" I look this way. I've traveled a long way and some of
the roads weren't paved.

We old folks should always try to be helpful in contributing to young
folks' real life education. Therefore, it seems we have a duty to
offend them occasionally.
 
Poor me, prostate cancer took away something and I seem to be loosing my appetite for food as well. Oh well it's still better than death.... most of the time.
 
The older I get, the harder I have to work to do the things that were easy when I was young. No wonder I get tired quicker now.
Thirteen hours on the go yesterday and the only time I sat down in something that wasn't moving was 15 minutes to eat a sandwich and check emails for work.
In and out of a Jeep, 3 pickups, two tractors and two UTVs hauling grain, chasing the combine, and moving equipment. By the end of the day, I'd lost 2 coffee cups, a pair of gloves, one pair of sunglasses, an insulated vest, a flashlight, and a couple of wrenches. Most of this stuff will turn up eventually(I hope as one of the cups was a favorite).. At this rate, in a few more days I'll be too worn out to deer hunt--nope, never happen. I may doze off on the stand but I'd have to be locked up to just not go.
 
blackhawknj said:
Conversely consider the alternative.....
The hardest part of growing old is that you have to grow up.

DO WHAT?!?!?!?






My Dad's favorite line: "I'm not old. I've just been here a long time."

Bob Wright
 
Yep, pretty soon I only need a book with one chapter, I'll be able to watch the same suspense movie several times and be surprised each time. It's already getting that I don't hear old jokes much now... I just don't remember them.
 
"Then God considered the function of bladders and decided seniors would have additional calls of nature requiring more trips to the bathroom, thus providing more exercise. God looked down and saw that it was good."

Ok, I understand that but why did He make the times to go midnight, 2AM, 4AM, 6AM and whenever I get in the morning? :shock: You'd think that by 6AM I'd be totally drained out. :?: And yeag that's every dadblasted night of the week. :x
Paul B.
 
Why is it I only need to go once a day but four times at night?? By the time I get that CPAC mask off and put back on I am fully awake again again again again. And then the wife also wakes me up again again and again.
 
In my youth I got fed up with all the narrow minded, bad mannered, egotistical, immature and obnoxious curmudgeons who thought "Senior Citizen" status bestowed up them rights and privileges, one of which was to behave the way they did. Now that I am a "Senior Citizen" I remind myself that they serve as a bad example.
 
Poco Oso said:
Fox Mike said:
Jeepnik said:
Anymore #8 isn't 100% true.
And you say this because. ??????

I'm guessing, in vitro fertilization, cloning, test tube babies, etc. Better living through chemistry. :wink:

Bingo. I'd have answered sooner, but my computer bit the big one and I'me just getting caught up.
 
Very good points, and so true. Getting old has been hard on me, but what can I do? God puts us here for a little while, and then its adios.
 
Back
Top