Patience & good example can pay off with kids

[gnappi]

My son went through tough times after the divorce but I was still a hands on dad within the limitations of court defined visitation and he spent a year in college and dropped out.

After he was emancipated he lived with me and I had few rules and I leaned on him a bit about cigarette smoking in the house as well as it being an alcohol and marijuana free zone. All of which he had issues with so in a couple of years he was told to move out.

How a bit of time changes things. Luckily he's a diligent worker and has made a good career for himself making really decent money. Now at 30 he's free of smoking all sorts of stupid stuff, doesn't drink, has become an avid fishermen and shooter, drives a nice car, pays all of his own bills and we're still the best of friends.

Patience and being a good example seems to have paid off, I hope it can be this way for every parent.

After 15+ years I still terribly miss the girl I married but NOT the person she became

There's an old saying that goes something like... "No matter how hot she is, someone is glad to be rid of her" Amen to that!

 

[CBH44]

Love this story.

 

[Cholo]

Congrats on a job well done, Dad!

 

[Fujicon]

Being a Dad always seems like a bit of push-pull. Who needs to adjust to the other? Should the Dad adjust to how the kid turns out, or should the kid adjust to how the parents have always been? Both I guess. I've been lucky that none of my kids got into smoking, drugs, teenage pregnancies, etc., but I was definitely challenged by my oldest son deciding not to attend college despite the college fund we saved up for him. He wanted to pursue his interest in music instead, which I deemed to be a massive mistake. Argued until I was blue in the face about how disastrous that decision was, but to no avail. I was the one who had to finally adjust, and since learned to respect him and the courage of his conviction to be true to himself. Honestly, I've more than adjusted, he's taught me to be truer to myself as well.

 

[Jeepnik]

I can't figure it out. Why was I so blessed with my kids. No law issues except a couple of ticket. No drug or alcohol use, that I know of.

Between school and sports I kept them so busy they just didn't have time for serious trouble. Church sure didn't hurt.

After high school both became Marines and some NCO's problem. And they did act up a bit, as young military personnel will do, but the nameless NCO's dealt with that.

No married and cops. I have no idea what I did to deserve them.

 

[Bob Wright]

When the outlook of Human Nature seems the bleakest, I turn to the Ruger Forum often for an uplift. There are decent, Godly men here.

Thank you.

Bob Wright

 

[Don Lovel]

My grandson Indigo will be 19 in a couple weeks. He is working doing landscaping and gardens for a neighbor. He is such a nice kid. Has learned from some of his disfunctional relatives on his dads side and his mom's failure of a 2nd husband to stay clean and sober. He is homeschooling linguistics and financial stuff and is pretty sharp. He knows some Chinese and Spanish and is learning Danish and German.
I am pushing personal skills and physical conditioning. I fear he will need to be alot tougher than he actually is. He is actually too nice to people who probably do not deserve it.
The difference in the world the year I turned 19 and him turning 19 is pretty scary.

 

[Jeepnik]

Godly, yes a lot are. But even those who don't believe seem to be blessed with a strong moral compass.

Whatever you call it, a good man will always do the right thing. Often no matter how hard or how much it hurts.

 

[Kevin]

I can't figure it out. Why was I so blessed with my kids. No law issues except a couple of ticket. No drug or alcohol use, that I know of.

Between school and sports I kept them so busy they just didn't have time for serious trouble. Church sure didn't hurt.

After high school both became Marines and some NCO's problem. And they did act up a bit, as young military personnel will do, but the nameless NCO's dealt with that.

No married and cops. I have no idea what I did to deserve them.

Jeepnik, my wife and I feel the same way. Our daughter is only 15, but we don't have to push her to keep an almost 4.0 gpa, and she is involved in all sorts of activities at school. My biggest annoyance is driving her around to these activities. But that's really not a big deal. She will graduate in a couple years, and wants to go to college in a different state, just for a change of scenery. So who knows, we are getting tired of Dallas, and might just sell the house and move with her.

 

[wproct]

My wife and I have two kids, a girl and a boy. Both are now in their 50's and are good people, as is our grandchildren. Being good parents and raising good kids is a work in progress. I will admit that I was not always the best parent, but if you asked my kids they would say I was fine. Attending church and being "Godly" is ok, but isn't always an end all answer. Treating people as you would like to be treated and not being mean to anyone goes a long way. Raising good kids normally isn't an accident, it does take effort.

 

[Bob Wright]

................................................................ Attending church and being "Godly" is ok, but isn't always an end all answer. Treating people as you would like to be treated and not being mean to anyone goes a long way. Raising good kids normally isn't an accident, it does take effort.

Seems to me that is Godly teaching......

Bob Wright

 

[dannyd]

My kids turned out okay because of my wife, I sucked in the dad department because I was always deployed (I volunteered to go) and was never home. I just backed up what ever she told them to do, so if they asked her and she said No, then came and asked me, someone got a spanking.

We had girls, to me there no where near as a hard as boys to raise, I was in charge of 51 guy's, they were definitely painful at times.

My girls are in their mid 40's both have been married for over 20 years and my son-in-laws are good dad's and husbands.

I told both son-in-laws when they got married I have set the bar way low as a husband and dad, so you guy's should have no problems doing better and they did, very proud of those guy's.