Military Advice

[Fox Mike]

The three most common military aviation expressions (or famous last words) are:
'Did you feel that?' 'What's that noise?' and 'Oh Crap!'

'Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do.'

‘Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you.’

'If the enemy is in range, so are you.'

'Tracers work both ways.'

"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."

‘If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.’

‘Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last, and don't ever volunteer for anything.’

'A good landing is when you can walk away from the plane.
A great landing is when you can reuse the plane.'

'The only time you have too much fuel is when you're on fire.'

'Five second grenade fuses last about three seconds.'

'Flashlights are tubular metal containers kept in a flight bag for the purpose of storing dead batteries.'

BASIC FLYING RULES.
'Try to stay in the middle of the air. Do not go near the edges of it. The edges of the air can be recognized by the appearance of ground, buildings, sea, and trees. It is much more difficult to fly there."

Things that must be together to work, usually can't be shipped together."

'Any ship can be a minesweeper. Once.‘

Co-Pilot Checklist.
1. Don't touch anything.
2. Keep your mouth shut.

 

[contender]

AMEN!!!!!!!!

 

[stevemb]

LMAO ! Never used that term before, so thanks ! The tracer thing, I consider to be same/same for the use of weapons lights for civilians, non-team use. You are both getting and giving light, and at least within your own home should already have the advantage, why give it away ? Kids in the home do change everything I understand.

 

[Colonialgirl]

I found one error, Although it gets repeated over and over as gospel:

don't ever volunteer for anything.’

Actually, that SHOULD be "Volunteer judiciously and with intelligence to AVOID other unpleasant events".

I practiced that all through my military career and :

1. First Saturday in advance training, volunteered to get a pot of coffee for the Sgt instructors, snagged a plate of Cake for them along with the coffee and got the rest of the day off.

2. Admitted that I had a 6th Army DL at the replacement center at Ft Lewis WA and got to drive a pick up truck while everybody else had to walk along behind picking up stones in the picnic grounds and tossing them in the truck.

3. Selected for KP at the same place at Ft Lewis, wound up at the Staff mess hall, Had STEAK cooked perfectly for dinner and not much work because most Staff went home for dinner.

4. Volunteered to act as a driver for a Major going on a Court Martial investigation and at the unit got treated as a VIP by the Top Sgt.

5. There are other examples, BUT it was better to PICK what you got selected for rather than taking pot luck !!

 

[Paul B]

Mr. grenade is not your friend.
Paul B.

 

[fiasconva]

My NCOIC used to say, "If you don't have anything to do, don't do it here."

 

[pawncop]

I would add my favorite - "Friendly fire isn't.".

 

[graygun]

Avoid the sergeant major if possible.

 

[Wyandot Jim]

If you have to bail out make sure it isn't over a place you just bombed.

 

[blume357]

does anybody remember the movie that had a very young Bob Newhart as the staff peon who got stranded with a small group of GI's trying to defend a position and they discovered a bug in the bunker that used to be the German command post and so they had him pretend to be calling head quarter and telling them not to send any more men they didn't have anywhere to put them.

Classic Bob Newhart.

 

[exavid]

My father always said that anyone who volunteers doesn't understand the question.
I kept that in mind during my two years in the Army.

 

[Hugh]

Vietnam 1965. Did volunteer to be there. The Colonel asked me if I could drive. I said yes, sir. He said you're my driver; I was his driver for a year. What an experience, wouldn't have missed it for anything.

 

[gramps]

My father was a Master Sgt in WW 2. He stated if you get in the military, don't volunteer for anything. I said huh? " Let me splain", he said. We were at morning formation, when the Sarge asked all those who could drive a truck, to take one step forward. Everyone but my dad took one step forward. Left face barked the sarge, and marched them off to parts unknown. 30 minutes later, dad is still standing at the flag pole, when an officer walked by, noticed Dad all alone, and asked why. Dad told him what had happened. The officer asked if Dad could drive a truck. I don't know, Dad replied. The officer took him to the truck pool, where they put him in a big truck, and taught him to drive it. As he drove around he noticed his group working on the side of the road with shovels, rakes, and wheel barrows. That, buddy boy is why you don't volunteer! OTOH CG does make a good point.
gramps

 

[Pal Val]

I was in boot camp. We were all in the barracks spit-polishing everything for an inspection. My buddy Vince was sitting on the steps shining his boots. The sergeant came by and asked Vince if he had anything better to do. Vince (not too smart) said no. So, Vince pulled guard duty five nights in a row.
Lesson learned. Never tell the sergeant you're not busy.

 

[Wyandot Jim]

Yep those DI/TIs know all the tricks. In basic our squadron was asked by the TI who had drivers licensees. Well about half raised their hand. Yep we got to go drive lawn mowers for the day.

 

[Ken Dowdy]

"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo."

This one cracked me up!

 

[wwb]

If you walk around carrying a clipboard and act like you know what you're doing, you can get away with darn near anything.

 

[vito]

Some understand better than others how to get along in the military. At one of my assignments I had an NCO working for me who seemed not very bright, but a real gung-ho attitude. He seemed to be really trying but struggled to get his work done, so over time I reassigned some of his duties to others in the unit. As time went on, I hadn't realized that I had reduced his job to almost nothing. Later I found out that he was working a civilian job on Army time for extra income, because his "official" duties only took about an hour a day. I didn't know whether to be really pissed off at him or admire his ingenuity (this all happened right after I returned to CONUS from Vietnam, and I think I was a bit too easygoing at the time).