Well even great families have this crap going on.

[Don Lovel]

My youngest daughter's husband short circuited, did a bunch of meth, blew it with his work situation, she kicked him out, he is supposedly running around out here in Colorado somewhere. If I catch up to him I will try my best to not just blow big holes in him or cripple him, then try to round him into getting some help, or maybe just handcuff him to a tree out near my elk camp somewhere with a wool blanket, a pauncho and some MRE's & a jug of water until he decides to get his act together.
He is my 11yr old grandson's step dad, the boy looks up to him, (really torques me that he would let Indigo down) and my youngest grandson he had with my daughter really needs his dad and until this, he has been really good to his family, but a few months ago, got hooked up with an electrical contractor crew doing new Texas Roadhouse steakhouse locations on a tight and fast moving schedule. Yep, the whole crew was tweakers, foreman was selling the meth. Sucked him into it too.
Brooks Electric in Lawrence Kansas in case you run into their worthless druggie butts on a jobsite.

My oldest daughter's husband just called me to talk about it, he was really mad that the screwup did not let him know what he was up to as they were fishing last weekend together and he thought that they were pretty tight. Oldest daughter's husband is a really great guy, wanted to let me know if I needed help dealing with our problem boy, he was 30 minutes from being able to leave the house and drive out here to help me go get him.

Heroin killing off folks in record numbers lately, meth still doing horrible damage. Was in the illusion that just maybe my family was being spared, NOPE

our family is very tight, this one snuck up on us and it really hurts

I cried for that boy tonight, I sure hope I don't hurt him really bad when I get him in front of me

 

[exavid]

Sorry to hear about more drug damage to folks. I don't think the legalization of pot in WA, OR, CO and probably soon in CA is going to lead to good things either.

 

[SamV]

I wish I could say that I haven't seen this situation before, but I can't. I have seen several fine people hit some sort of crises and crash like that. One accidentally set his house on fire while using drugs. Fortunately his wife and kids got out, he did not. In another situation, another guy ruined his life with meth. Another was so bad that I am not going to share it. These were basic middle class guys, with jobs and families. Not teenagers but early middle age men. Those of us around them were puzzled at their behavior. None were drug users or alcoholics. They knew better and still decided to try meth, or crack, or heroin. What a disaster for them and their families.
I hope that your son-in-law is willing and able to turn his life around for his and everyone's benefit. I will say a little prayer for all of you.

 

[eveled]

Thanks for sharing. Really scary world we live in now. Especially if you are raising kids. Good luck with your family crisis, focus on the kids. God bless you all.

 

[volshooter]

Sorry to hear about the mess. I'm glad that I am old enough to have never run into these drugs. Here we do have a very serious pain med abuse problem.
Perhaps your son in law will come around...... with some help.

 

[pruger45]

Being in recovery for more than 19 years I see it all the time. You and your family are in my prayers.

 

[powder smoke]

Really too bad Don, wish you and your family the best.
Prayers sent! ps

 

[Mobuck]

The result of the current attitude of "acceptance". First the SIL "accepted" that the crew was into meth. Next, SIL "accepted" that the crew did make a lot of progress in a short period of time. Then, he "accepted" the opportunity to become part of the hopped up group.
While I agree that a darned good butt whuppin is fully in order, I seriously doubt that is the real answer to your SIL's current issues.
I quit drinking June 7, 1997 because I finally realized how much I was hurting my family. The break was complete and irreversible (in my mind) so I can sit in a bar with the others in my work group and drink water or soda while watching them get chit faced drunk and not feel any urge to join them. Your SIL has shown a weakness that only he can control. If the family isn't high enough on his list of priorities to override the need for drugs, he's not going to make the break.

 

[Don Lovel]

Sorry to hear about more drug damage to folks. I don't think the legalization of pot in WA, OR, CO and probably soon in CA is going to lead to good things either.

Nope I disagree on the pot thing. Living in Colorado, I get a good view of what it is doing and very seriously, it is not the problem. In fact I will defend that it is doing way more positive things for a bunch of folks and as my Sheriff says, "pot is just not any kind of problem for us, considering we grow tonnage here in our county".
If you are still living in the "Reefer madness" mindset, you seriously need to educate yourself about the truth on all things marijuana. It is actually getting to be a very legit and well regulated business that contributes to the community here in jobs and tax revenue and new business ventures in medical and recreational use.

the real problem continues to be hard narcotics like Meth and Heroin and pharmaceuticals real and faked.
The problem is our failed government's open border allowing heroin and meth to come in from Mexico.
And the urban decay that is helping to spread it. The junkies have been offered free marijuana and oils, and they do not want it. They like that black tar heroin and fentanyl and good ole meth.

 

[Don Lovel]

I wish I could say that I haven't seen this situation before, but I can't. I have seen several fine people hit some sort of crises and crash like that. One accidentally set his house on fire while using drugs. Fortunately his wife and kids got out, he did not. In another situation, another guy ruined his life with meth. Another was so bad that I am not going to share it. These were basic middle class guys, with jobs and families. Not teenagers but early middle age men. Those of us around them were puzzled at their behavior. None were drug users or alcoholics. They knew better and still decided to try meth, or crack, or heroin. What a disaster for them and their families.
I hope that your son-in-law is willing and able to turn his life around for his and everyone's benefit. I will say a little prayer for all of you.

you just describes my boy's situation, young good man, working a great paying job with great benefits suddenly turns and dives into the abyss
has his family very confused why

 

[Pistolero]

"The problem is our failed government's open border allowing heroin and meth to come in from Mexico".
*****************************************************************************
Don,
You sure have that right. We will keep you and your family in our prayers.

Mike

 

[powder smoke]

X10 on the open borders, smugglers are having a field day, time to shut it down.

Heard the cartel put out a hit on Trump if he wins.
He will make it far more difficult for them. ps

 

[opos]

Sorry to hear about more drug damage to folks. I don't think the legalization of pot in WA, OR, CO and probably soon in CA is going to lead to good things either.

Nope I disagree on the pot thing. Living in Colorado, I get a good view of what it is doing and very seriously, it is not the problem. In fact I will defend that it is doing way more positive things for a bunch of folks and as my Sheriff says, "pot is just not any kind of problem for us, considering we grow tonnage here in our county".
If you are still living in the "Reefer madness" mindset, you seriously need to educate yourself about the truth on all things marijuana. It is actually getting to be a very legit and well regulated business that contributes to the community here in jobs and tax revenue and new business ventures in medical and recreational use.

the real problem continues to be hard narcotics like Meth and Heroin and pharmaceuticals real and faked.
The problem is our failed government's open border allowing heroin and meth to come in from Mexico.
And the urban decay that is helping to spread it. The junkies have been offered free marijuana and oils, and they do not want it. They like that black tar heroin and fentanyl and good ole meth.

Got a comment that sort of "circles the issue". I've been a sober member of a 12 step program for 36 years..I had no issue with any illegal drugs other than a couple of times trying marijuana and frankly it was not anything I had any use for..drugs were not prevelent back in my day so I just didn't have much interest nor ability to use them...I have been active in my "program" and have met and worked with hundreds of men of all ages and backgrounds over that time....Many have come from the age when Marijuana and other drugs were easy to get and often the people have had "dual addictions" to various drugs and alcohol. In my experience and that is all it is...the folks that begin to drink again often begin with smoking Marijuana or with pain killers prescribed for an issue and the issue goes away but the use continues...then because of the simplicity of buying and using alcohol they begin to drink in earnest again.

The men I have talked with and worked with over the years that have had drug as well as alcohol problems almost to a man began their alcoholism drinking beer and began their drug addiction using marijuana.....I look at both beer and marijuana as "gateway" substances. I grew up in Colorado and used to say I'd been weaned on "Colorado koolaid" (Coors beer)...I didn't begin 30 years of alcoholic drinking by downing a quart of vodka...I began with weekend "beer busts" with other teens...I see and hear exactly the same talk from drug addicts...they frequently began using drugs with marijuana and their addictions to opiates, meth, etc grew out of that...from being in the environment where the progression was normal for many of their friends.

I don't excuse the behavior of a wet drunk nor a using addict...I do know there is help...it can come in many forms but unfortunately a very small percentage of true alcoholics or addicts will seek help and if sought a very small percentage of those will stay clean or sober for very long..it's a long path. Even with the years of sobriety I have if a friend or relative of mine comes to me about their using or drinking I will direct them to places I know there might be help....at that point they either show willingness and go investigate or they blow it off...I don't work with frineds or relatives as I already know too much about them and I'm probably "tainted" in the objective view I'd need to try and be of help.

Now this is probably going to offend some folks but when I hear "the family had no idea" or "it all came on unexpectedly" I really wonder about that....My first wife and my family all knew about my addicition...they didn't raise a fuss jsut sort of to keep peace...until it all really hit the fan..it was not that they "didn't know" it was that they had lived in an alcoholic environment with me and had become so attuned to ignoring or accepting my behavior that it became a way of life...I do not believe for one minute that the spouse of a drug user, an alcoholic, a habitual gambler, a sexual addict, etc can live with the person and not know what is going on....all those addictions take time, money and deceit and the spouse or people close have to know. Enabling is a sickness that has recovery programs to deal with the "co dependent" person...that might be a start for parents, spouses, children, etc that have been so damaged by a life filled with addiction.

Taking a shot at a user or alkie, beating the hell out of them..cutting them off....etc just doesn't work....I'd offer that anyone that is affected by having a practicing alcoholic or user in the family or among aquaintences simply have nothing to do with them unless they ask for help (no not money or housing)..and then direct them to help from folks that can truly help....a non alcoholic or non user can never understand nor have any or much impact on a user...a non user cannot begin to understand what motivates the addict...I've watched hundreds of wives, children, parents, bosses, co workers, doctors, etc try and "get the addict" straightened out....I won't "tell my story" here but a lot of people tried to have an impact on my life for a very long time....I'm one of the fortunate ones that slammed into submission so hard and so suddenly that I was able to finally get the message that it had to end or I had to die...many choose to die...I chose to live.

 

[CGDustDevil]

Don,

Man, your story is so familiar... We had a very similar situation 9 or 10 years ago with my stepdaughter's boyfriend. Same sort of deal - Was working, got hooked up with a 'crew' and he was toast. Damn near had to kill him.

With God's grace, he ultimately sorted himself out, but not before he lost his family. It was so bad for a while that we had to get Susan and the baby out of Az., and I was constantly on the lookout for trouble from the Randy, the BF. Thankfully, I had instilled enough fear in Randy when things were still on an even keel that he knew better than to mess with me when he was in his right mind. It's when he wasn't that bothered me.

That crap makes people do some really bad stuff. I hope and pray that your situation gets ironed out... Someone ought to go after that outfit, or at least the SOB selling the junk.

Best regards, Pete

 

[Jimbo357mag]

Thanks for sharing. I will hope and pray that things work out for you and your family. Seems like so far the damage may be reversible, here's hoping. :(

 

[Don Lovel]

Don,

Man, your story is so familiar... We had a very similar situation 9 or 10 years ago with my stepdaughter's boyfriend. Same sort of deal - Was working, got hooked up with a 'crew' and he was toast. Damn near had to kill him.

With God's grace, he ultimately sorted himself out, but not before he lost his family. It was so bad for a while that we had to get Susan and the baby out of Az., and I was constantly on the lookout for trouble from the Randy, the BF. Thankfully, I had instilled enough fear in Randy when things were still on an even keel that he knew better than to mess with me when he was in his right mind. It's when he wasn't that bothered me.

That crap makes people do some really bad stuff. I hope and pray that your situation gets ironed out... Someone ought to go after that outfit, or at least the SOB selling the junk.

Best regards, Pete

Work crew can get you in a bunch of trouble. I was working as derrickman on a rig in Oklahoma in the late 70's, my tool pusher, driller and motorman were snorting meth off the glass on the weight indicator on the driller's control panel. I walked away from that job after punching out the motorman for pressuring me that if I did not do meth too they would hurt me. I hurt him instead.
my son in law has worked real hard to gain my favor over the last many years. Seriously, he earned a full man card with his coming from no skills stupid kid to almost being a journeyman electrician, been working great pay scale and Federal jobsites doing solar panel installs. Solar jobs slowed, Tradesman sent him to work new installs on Texas Roadhouse locations. From what my daughter told me, his foreman is his dealer.
I called the New COnstruction manager of Texas Roadhouse in Kentucky first thing this morning and lit his ass on fire about what was going on, he started off being skeptical with me and I brought up that I was a retired construction manager and we would not hesitate to talk legalities of failure to enforce Federal Drug Free workplace regs, he suddenly got real cooperative with me. The general and subs are going to get proctoscoped on this one I hope

The kid has a great paying job, just bought a nice place outside Lawrence Kansas with good fishing in the back yard, decent vehicles, a fun wife and great kids, his in laws love him very much, but he really pissed off my other son in laws, he needs to worry about them thumpin him more than from me. We have worked hard at being a tight family with each other's backs. My oldest daughter's husband summed it up really good with "What a dumbass, he actually thought we as a family would let this crap slide?"

 

[Colonialgirl]

Good Luck with him Don; I hope he can be turned back to the right side for the sake of his wife and kids.

 

[Mike Armstrong]

I used to work with a long-term rehab program in upstate NYS that was run by the chaplain of the NYS "Corrections Dept," a Catholic priest. Among the many things he told me was that "Cocaine is very democratic. It gets EVERYBODY." And the other drugs--and booze--are equally "democratic."

And I saw proof of that in the years I worked with his people--bankers to bums, all turned into criminals and often corpses. And the collateral damage of ruined families, traumatized children, parents, and communities. If you ever want to see how much "no man is an island," examine how the ruin of one person spreads out to damage a crowd of his/her loving relations....a man is really more like a continent!

There is some recent evidence that MEDICAL marijuana, I don't mean FAKED medical marijuana, helps people NOT get hooked on opiod prescription pain killers. God gave us drugs for good reasons, we just need to USE them for good reasons.

These stories are sobering. Sorry anybody has to go thru this stuff. I think the first thing everyone needs to do is REALLY consider the proposition "There but for the grace of God go I," and quit thinking that these issues apply only to "the other guy" and his/her family. Every family has some history of drug or alcohol dependency and everyone should own up to that, face it, and prepare for it. Mainly by talking about it--that's the first step and it is a "step" that we all should keep taking.

 

[Pat-inCO]

Two things . . . .

~ Meth's effect is cumulative, and permanent.
At least based on what doctors currently know.

~ The show Alaska State Troopers had a comment from one of the
troopers that seems relevant. He said that of all the illegal-drug users
in Alaska he knows of (and there are BUNCHES), not one of them
did not start with MJ.

While there may well be situations where MJ is a valid treatment for
ailments, most using it are in it for the high.

 

[vito]

Sad story and my heart and prayers are with you. But despite your best intentions, nothing you do will straighten out an addict. He has to do it himself. Every single case I know of where family and friends try to help, all they do is enable the addiction to continue. Save your energy and resources for your daughter and the two kids. They are the real victims.

 

[blackhawknj]

I wonder how many industrial accidents-Deepwater Horizon, e.g.-result from on the job drug use.

 

[CGDustDevil]

my son in law has worked real hard to gain my favor over the last many years. Seriously, he earned a full man card with his coming from no skills stupid kid to almost being a journeyman electrician, been working great pay scale and Federal jobsites doing solar panel installs.

Man, that's incredible... I hope he gets his act sorted out. Most of all I hope that the rest of the family will forgive his colossal screw up. I've been around drunks, addicts, ne'redowells since my teens when I mixed it up with a 1% M.C. (Not the club members so much as the people we interacted with!)

Over my adult life, I've seen people who showed absolutely NO promise at all turn their lives around, and I've seen people I thought had their acts together go completely upside down and run themselves into their own graves or into prison over nothing at all. I've got two brother out of a family of 7 of us kids who couldn't get their noses out of the candy jar. One is dead and the other is doing everything he can to kill himself.

If it wasn't for people who put their faith in me when I was at my lowest points, I may never have rebooted my life, so I always favor forgiveness and helping out if I can do it.

Godspeed to your family and your son in law. I hope things can be recovered.

 

[Don Lovel]

my son in law has worked real hard to gain my favor over the last many years. Seriously, he earned a full man card with his coming from no skills stupid kid to almost being a journeyman electrician, been working great pay scale and Federal jobsites doing solar panel installs.

Man, that's incredible... I hope he gets his act sorted out. Most of all I hope that the rest of the family will forgive his colossal screw up. I've been around drunks, addicts, ne'redowells since my teens when I mixed it up with a 1% M.C. (Not the club members so much as the people we interacted with!)

Over my adult life, I've seen people who showed absolutely NO promise at all turn their lives around, and I've seen people I thought had their acts together go completely upside down and run themselves into their own graves or into prison over nothing at all. I've got two brother out of a family of 7 of us kids who couldn't get their noses out of the candy jar. One is dead and the other is doing everything he can to kill himself.

If it wasn't for people who put their faith in me when I was at my lowest points, I may never have rebooted my life, so I always favor forgiveness and helping out if I can do it.

Godspeed to your family and your son in law. I hope things can be recovered.

Sincere thank you, I had an old school HA straighten me out back in the day, old school 1% respect made me stick with it

 

[TinkerDave]

Sorry to hear about more drug damage to folks. I don't think the legalization of pot in WA, OR, CO and probably soon in CA is going to lead to good things either.

Kinda like the legalization of alcohol? THC from pot is very effective for helping people with painful medical conditions, helps folks with PTSD and recently has been shown to kill cancer cells. It is actually much less likely to cause the problems so commonly associated with alcohol - liver ailments, et al. You cannot legislate morality and we are a stupid country for trying to do so. TD

 

[redhawker]

Many liberals call drugs a "victimless crime". Ask the OP or his daughter if that's true and see what kind of answer you'll get.

 

[Hellraiser]

Too much.... had to edit.

Don... just stay legal. Don't jeopardize yore good life.... that boy ain't worth it.

 

[exavid]

Sorry to hear about more drug damage to folks. I don't think the legalization of pot in WA, OR, CO and probably soon in CA is going to lead to good things either.

Kinda like the legalization of alcohol? THC from pot is very effective for helping people with painful medical conditions, helps folks with PTSD and recently has been shown to kill cancer cells. It is actually much less likely to cause the problems so commonly associated with alcohol - liver ailments, et al. You cannot legislate morality and we are a stupid country for trying to do so. TD

You misunderstand my post. It's more than the increased use of pot which in itself will increase auto accidents for one thing, but the real problem is the various state and city governments using it as a cash cow. Look what happened to gambling. It wasn't all that long ago when it was called a 'numbers racket' and illegal. But the states found they could reap a lot of money out of gambling so the mob got chased out and the states took over. State lotteries are a tax on those who can least afford it. It encourages some folks to waste their money on pie in the sky instead of on their families.

Legal pot will definitely increase the usage around the country. There will be more accidents, but it's the government's involvement that will promote and encourage its use for the tax income. What's next? Government bordellos? I don't give a rat's behind whether anyone uses what ever garbage they want to stuff in their body. But I do not want to see it becoming a government means of revenue. And that IS what's happening in the pot states. Politicians are drooling looking at that new monetary source. We can corrupt ourselves without the encouragement of our government.

 

[opos]

Sorry to hear about more drug damage to folks. I don't think the legalization of pot in WA, OR, CO and probably soon in CA is going to lead to good things either.

Kinda like the legalization of alcohol? THC from pot is very effective for helping people with painful medical conditions, helps folks with PTSD and recently has been shown to kill cancer cells. It is actually much less likely to cause the problems so commonly associated with alcohol - liver ailments, et al. You cannot legislate morality and we are a stupid country for trying to do so. TD

You misunderstand my post. It's more than the increased use of pot which in itself will increase auto accidents for one thing, but the real problem is the various state and city governments using it as a cash cow. Look what happened to gambling. It wasn't all that long ago when it was called a 'numbers racket' and illegal. But the states found they could reap a lot of money out of gambling so the mob got chased out and the states took over. State lotteries are a tax on those who can least afford it. It encourages some folks to waste their money on pie in the sky instead of on their families.

Legal pot will definitely increase the usage around the country. There will be more accidents, but it's the government's involvement that will promote and encourage its use for the tax income. What's next? Government bordellos? I don't give a rat's behind whether anyone uses what ever garbage they want to stuff in their body. But I do not want to see it becoming a government means of revenue. And that IS what's happening in the pot states. Politicians are drooling looking at that new monetary source. We can corrupt ourselves without the encouragement of our government.

The Government has already "dabbled" in the bordello business..when Joe Comforte lost the Nevada bordello some years ago for tax shortages as I recall...the Government took over the operation for a period of time...couldn't make it run and unloaded it...

 

[Don Lovel]

Kinda like the legalization of alcohol? THC from pot is very effective for helping people with painful medical conditions, helps folks with PTSD and recently has been shown to kill cancer cells. It is actually much less likely to cause the problems so commonly associated with alcohol - liver ailments, et al. You cannot legislate morality and we are a stupid country for trying to do so. TD[/quote]

You misunderstand my post. It's more than the increased use of pot which in itself will increase auto accidents for one thing, but the real problem is the various state and city governments using it as a cash cow. Look what happened to gambling. It wasn't all that long ago when it was called a 'numbers racket' and illegal. But the states found they could reap a lot of money out of gambling so the mob got chased out and the states took over. State lotteries are a tax on those who can least afford it. It encourages some folks to waste their money on pie in the sky instead of on their families.

Legal pot will definitely increase the usage around the country. There will be more accidents, but it's the government's involvement that will promote and encourage its use for the tax income. What's next? Government bordellos? I don't give a rat's behind whether anyone uses what ever garbage they want to stuff in their body. But I do not want to see it becoming a government means of revenue. And that IS what's happening in the pot states. Politicians are drooling looking at that new monetary source. We can corrupt ourselves without the encouragement of our government.[/quote]

The Government has already "dabbled" in the bordello business..when Joe Comforte lost the Nevada bordello some years ago for tax shortages as I recall...the Government took over the operation for a period of time...couldn't make it run and unloaded it...[/quote]

A friend of mine is the nephew of Joe Conforte and worked doing all the maintenance at the Mustang Ranch. His stories of just how screwy the Feds are is some pretty entertaining stuff.
Basically it comes down to the fact that the Feds are too inept to run a brothel

 

[Rick Courtright]

A friend of mine is the nephew of Joe Conforte and worked doing all the maintenance at the Mustang Ranch. His stories of just how screwy the Feds are is some pretty entertaining stuff.
Basically it comes down to the fact that the Feds are too inept to run a brothel

Hi,

Sally and Joe were well known in the trapshooting community in this part of the country back when, though not for what seems like the obvious reason. Joe sponsored a number of live pigeon shoots out at "the ranch", which were pretty scarce around here.

Since their tax problems were hardly a secret, I "just had to" watch a documentary on the place when the Feds were threatening to take the business over. They interviewed one of the girls who'd worked there for quite some time, and asked what she thought might happen.

She answered it would probably be the first time in history a bordello went broke, as the Feds couldn't even make a buck doing to us what they do best! ;) And sure enough, a few months later... adios!

Rick C