Mental health

[protoolman]

My whole life I've had good jobs. Just got fired by a 25 year old for a silly reason but I guess it made her feel big. No problem thinks I, I will just get another, after a try I quit another because it was above my skill level. Now I'm depressed anxious generally a mess, no healthcare insurance and thinking should I go to a doctor before I run out of money? I can't start a new job with the mental state I'm in. Do the happy drugs work? Do they cost a lot on self pay? I just want to hear from someone what worked for them. PMs are fine too. I have 7 years to social security and 5 to Medicare so I'm on my own financially with no insurance at the moment.

 

[gunzo]

It's shock, I know from experience.

Try to chill if ya can. Sounds very familiar to my situation when I was 55 & lost a solid job. Not a prime age to be unemployed. If ya have emergency cash, cruise a while, get your head straight & weigh your options. A ton of employers out there now looking for mature workers that can pass a drug test. Hell! some waiving the test.

A great market exist for a hiree now, good pay & employers glad to have you.

Trim fat if ya have too. An extra vehicle that's worth more than the loan & not needed for day to day? Unload it. Get rid of a payment plus taxes & insurance.

A person with a pencil & paper can quickly realize they don't quite need the amount of cash they thought they did.

 

[twerpymoon]

Good on you for asking for help. It's nothing to be ashamed of. Happy pills have kept me on an even keel for thirty years. Most of them are generic now, so more affordable. There are way more places offering to lend an ear and help these days.

 

[Cholo]

I don't have any solid advice except to avoid alcohol at all costs.

 

[gnappi]

Booze and other anti-depressants only add to the problems. Believe me, whether you have faith or not (though it's helpful if you do) somehow you manage. Whatever field you're in there's always work for honest hard workers, somewhere.

Be aware of one thing, physicians are likely to have an issue with your being a depressed firearm owner and they can and will report suspected mental health issues to authorities. My dad was held for a week or so and the doctor in charge was going to have his driver's license and concealed weapons license revoked but he passed away before they could.

I look at no doctor as a friend and confidant, though a priest, minister etc. can be a great source as a sounding board.

 

[Mobuck]

I'm not going to be much help but I can empathize.
Pick up some kind of job even if it's not what you want. That will help you overcome the short term needs. Those who have skills and want to be productive will find a job. Having a job will help you feel better and move on from the loss of your previous job.
Health issues forced me out of my last job and I'm still stressed about how to manage the loss of that income. At my age, no one is going to hire me so I don't have a choice. Hopefully, you can work this out.

 

[protoolman]

Thanks guys all good suggestions. I talked to some people the last couple of days and I've got a plan. I actually feel a lot better just bouncing this off people. You all just reassure me that my plan is sound. I've already talked to family, pastor, etc. looks like I'm feeling better already. Now I got to get out and take my vitamins and get some exercise! Thanks for the support!

 

[turd]

I'm not going to be much help but I can empathize.
Pick up some kind of job even if it's not what you want. That will help you overcome the short term needs.

This.

 

[rugnelli]

protoolman. We are all behind you, you got this.

 

[rice paddy daddy]

I've got a little bit of experience with mental health, was treated by the VA for PTSD for 9 years.
I refused all their offers of drugs after seeing what it did to my buddies.

I agree with the others about avoiding alcohol.
If marijuana is legal in your area, you might want to get a prescription from a doctor.
As for me, I stay stone cold sober, no drugs no alcohol.

 

[JackBull]

Not sure what you are qualified to do but most businesses will hire anyone. If you are not sick, why see a doctor? So many job openings you could get one by this afternoon.

 

[Mobuck]

Take some advice from a 'self medication addict': don't use chemistry to pull you out of this jam.

 

[RC44Mag]

I think all of us have been in relatable situations throughout our lives at some point. Ups and downs of life. You can ride it out and it will get better for you. As said, try to do this Chem free it’ll help you cope better and not use drugs/booze as a crutch which will likely keep you down longer then if you keep a clear head. Best wishes and you need someone to talk to feel free to send me a message.

 

[contender]

I read your post last night protoolman,, and I wanted to think about it before I made any comments.

Many, many people lose a job for various reasons, and it can create a very real sense of panic, depression, fears, worries, stress etc. Miss Penny had a job where the owner/boss suffered a huge loss (housing market crash,) & decided to declare bankruptcy. She was making good money there, and was a big reason he had actually been doing ok until the market collapsed. And our oldest,, had a very good job,, when the owner/boss came in & announced that the whole division was moving several states away & fired that whole division.
It took Miss Penny a while to find a job that offered half-way decent money. She had one job interview, where she was told she was over qualified & would be bored there. She kept trying & finally got one job,, but after a few years,, she was head-hunted into a much better position.
And our oldest,, he started applying to places he liked,, and actually got a much better job in a place he really wanted to work for.
But both of them had stress & worries until things changed & they got another job.

First, a positive attitude helps a lot. Next,, be open with everything, and discuss it with family, friends, clergy, etc. Being unemployed is not an embarrassment unless you let it be. In fact,, if folks are honest,, all of us have had it happen a few times in our lives.
But the biggest thing is to be open & honest. By talking about it,, you will get others who can relate, and understand. And,, you will see that it's not as bad as it may feel. Of course,, by making plans, cutting back expenses & such to assure you can pay for the necessities is also a key thing.

With all this,, I also read your second post & see you ARE doing much of the very same things I've mentioned. KUDOS!!!!!!!!!

I'll close with this;

As mentioned above,, we at this fine Forum are here for you & by all means,, vent, discuss, or whatever here. You have our support!

 

[Fox Mike]

Having never been in that situation I can't give any advice except to echo what has already been said. Stay away from drugs and alcohol. I was once told that when one door shuts another will open. Hang in there.

 

[turd]

One of the worst things that happens when you lose a position that you have filled well for years is the blow to your self confidence. It may be difficult to near impossible to find the same kind of job (ask me how I know) dependent upon a lot of things, not least of which is location and uniqueness of the position.
You ARE good at what you do, and you WILL be good at what you find. Don't stop looking. Always move forward. Believe in YOU.

 

[pyth0n]

You could try an exercise program, if not already on one. Any exercise to match your ability. It really does help to relieve stress & clear your head.
When I was job hunting I spent time at Job service. Lots of job postings. I would apply for 1, 2 , 3 jobs almost every day. It was like a full time job & gave me the satisfaction of doing something to help my self.
Just my $.02 for what it's worth.

 

[protoolman]

Thanks guys, I am exercising, long walks with wife every day. Starting a new job on Monday I'm not sure I'm up to, but I hope to tough it out until I feel better. Doing a walk for life today for a pro life organization and going to church Sunday. A doctor appointment Wednesday but I'm going to try to be healthy enough to just get some advice on my own. Wife has me taking Ashwagonda supplement. Is that good? Supposedly lowers high levels of cortisol?

 

[Cholo]

Here's the very general rundown on Ashwagandha:

https://www.webmd.com/vitamins/ai/ingredientmono-953/ashwagandha

 

[crstrode]

Ditto the lifetime of good jobs.

If you were a good employee, and were let go due to the insecure ego of a manager, chances are they are hurting worse than you are. It is their loss and your opportunity for gain.

I was involuntarily transferred out of a great job at age 52 by an incompetent jerk. He had to hire three guys to do my job. Not one after the other, but three at the same time.

I was pissed at first but it never hurt my self image, because I was doing great work and everyone (except the new manager) knew it.

A couple years into the new assignment, I decided to take early retirement. As it turns out, getting pushed out by a bozo was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

Life is short. Don't spend it making a knucklehead look good.

Breathe, breathe in the air
Don't be afraid to care
Leave but don't leave me
Look around, choose your own ground

Long you live and high you fly
And smiles you'll give and tears you'll cry
And all you touch and all you see
Is all your life will ever be

 

[WendyZXZ]

Ditto the lifetime of good jobs.

If you were a good employee, and were let go due to the insecure ego of a manager, chances are they are hurting worse than you are. It is their loss and you opportunity for gain.

I was involuntarily transferred out of a great job at age 52 by an incompetent jerk. He had to hire three guys to do my job. Not one after the other, but three at the same time.

I was pissed at first but it never hurt my self image, because I was doing great work and everyone (except the new manager) knew it.

A couple years into the new assignment, I decided to take early retirement. As it turns out, getting pushed out by a bozo was one of the best things that ever happened to me.

Life is short. Don't spend it making a knucklehead look good.

Breathe, breathe in the air
Don't be afraid to care
Leave but don't leave me
Look around, choose your own ground

Long you live and high you fly
And smiles you'll give and tears you'll cry
And all you touch and all you see
Is all your life will ever be

That can be so true on them hurting worse. It is especially true, what the job was, what skills, how many can be found that can do the same and more so their work ethic whether it is a worker, a producer or merely an employee that is nothing but furniture playing on the internet or a phone. They can end up with the scenario of: Nobody here knows how "whatever" works, you were the only one who got it so we need... That is when you get to set the contracting conditions with nothing being done until everything is signed. Minimum charge is for 2 hours at whatever rate you want and you pay me whether I am there for hours or 5 minutes.

 

[NC FNS]

Glad you found a job. After I got cancelled and we lost everything, we moved to NC because that’s where my wife got a job. I thought I’d have no trouble getting a job - 1 full time and 2 part-time jobs for 20 years straight, who wouldn’t want to hire Mr. Reliable and Trustworthy? Well, 2 months (and 50 applications) later I landed 2 jobs, but had to turn down the part-time one because they didn’t operate on the two days I had off from the other one.

$8 an hour (in 2011) and had a manager that was an unsuccessful lawyer and was a few years younger than me. Seemed like he had frustrations he needed to take out on someone. I could let his treatment of me roll off my back, but the other employees were quite upset that he treated me like he did.

Was hoping to complete a certification in that field so I could move up, but ended up completing a different certification (same as my wife had gotten) and was hired the next day at her employer. The good Lord was certainly looking out for us!

Hang in there, and keep us posted. We’re pulling for you!

 

[foolslife]

Protoolman trust me it will all work out. Been there done that. OMG where do I start. Very short story...I have always been the star employee, always. The last straw was at a large corporation where I was a star in the fast track program until a young HR woman came along that I did not get along with. She eventually worked to get me fired. Even my new boss didn't agree but it happened anyway.

It was devastating. I had never had a negative review, in fact as mentioned, I was on a fast track program for executive leadership roles. To which I had private corporate training. But she prevailed and I was fired with out severance after 25 years.

It was devastating. I spoke with many attorneys and executive friends and in the end decided to go my own way. In the end I worked another 15 years and retired.

In the end all is well. Yes I have been thru Xanax and buspirone (which I am still on), But I am now happily retired!

 

[protoolman]

Well things moving fast for me so far. Got a job offer with a 12k raise a year over my old one and lots more potential. Owner said he wil raise that a 90 days based on how fast I learn what could be a several year journey. I may get to 67 yet if soc sec and the stock market don't crash.

 

[DeletedMember275]

Check with your local government and see what kind of mental health assistance they can provide or refer you to. You may be eligible for low or no-cost treatment, since you're unemployed.

 

[Bad Barlow]

I don't have any solid advice except to avoid alcohol at all costs.

Ditto what Cholo said...

 

[Ride1949]

Well things moving fast for me so far. Got a job offer with a 12k raise a year over my old one and lots more potential. Owner said he wil raise that a 90 days based on how fast I learn what could be a several year journey. I may get to 67 yet if soc sec and the stock market don't crash.

Excellent!!! Congratulations.

 

[Johnnu2]

Well things moving fast for me so far. Got a job offer with a 12k raise a year over my old one and lots more potential. Owner said he wil raise that a 90 days based on how fast I learn what could be a several year journey. I may get to 67 yet if soc sec and the stock market don't crash.

CONGRATULATIONS........... doors do open.
J.

 

[MHtractorguy]

I lost a good job at 59. I got hired and worked as a manager at a car parts store until I could start SS. I hated the phones ringing all the time, the lazy employees and stupid, abusive customers, but the medical insurance was good, pay was steady and made it to the end of my working career with my health, my family and most of my toys.
You sound like you are on a good path. Never give up, never give in.

 

[tazbigdog]

Congratulations ! One door closes, another opens!