Jeep Coercion

[Huhwhat?]

Today was the first free day I've had with the Patriot since we bought it. Met the wife for lunch at our favorite Sicilian restaurant and ended up with half a Sicilian pizza to haul home. Later in the Jeep headed home...


Patriot: Hey...

Me: Silence

Patriot: HEY!

ME: What?

Patriot: Look, mountains.

Me: Yeah, I know. I have to take this pizza home, and I need a haircut.

Patriot: But...MOUNTAINS!

Me: Can't go to the mountains right now.

Patriot: How come?

Me: I have to go to Walmart. Besides the wife would be mad at me for going to the mountains without her, and she's at work.

Patriot: How's she gonna know?

Me: She'll know.

Patriot: She won't.

Me: I have the cameras with me.

Patriot: So?

Me: If I go to the mountains, I'll take photos. If I take photos, I'll post them on line. If I post them on line, she'll see them. If she sees them, she'll get mad.

Patriot: There must be some sort of deal we can work out.

Me: I doubt it.

Patriot: I'll give you 2 mpg better mileage next trip.

Me: Ummm...

PAtriot: 2 mpg...

Me: Ok.



So, here are a few from today, at the risk of getting a frying pan upside the head.

 

[Selena]

And just how long has your Jeep been talking to you persuading you to do inappropriate acts?

 

[Cracker-American]

My truck talks to me, yours doesn't Selena?

 

[Jimbo357mag]

I have always felt a connection to my vehicles but talking to them??? You sure that wasn't some OnStar operator having a little fun with you??

Oh, btw those are some beautiful pictures.

 

[Selena]

My truck talks to me, yours doesn't Selena?

Does your truck also attempt to persuade you to do inappropriate acts?

Columbine, columbine
Blue in the Rockies
Will you miss me, when I've gone away?
Will I see you next summer, wild on the mountain?
Will you be there, when I pass your way?

 

[Huhwhat?]

You sure that wasn't some OnStar operator having a little fun with you??

Since OnStar is a GM program, and this is a Jeep, I'm pretty sure it wasn't OnStar talking.

Does your truck also attempt to persuade you to do inappropriate acts?

Sometimes mine tells me to kill the neighbors, and then I have to say "No, no. Bad Jeep."

 

[gramps]

I am sure there are medications for that, but then we would miss the pretty pictures. Ok, skip the meds !
gramps

 

[Selena]

Sometimes mine tells me to kill the neighbors, and then I have to say "No, no. Bad Jeep."

Wise decision. :lol:

 

[Number9]

Yeah, I hear ya... loud and clear!

 

[Colonialgirl]

You can ALWAYS CLAIM that you was taking the long way home because the jeep led you astray from the short way home !
:roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :roll: :wink: :wink:

 

[DA_TriggR4Ruger]

SIRI over Bluetooth?

But seriously NICE pics. 2 mpg extra is sooo worth it! She won't be too mad.

Great pics, again.

 

[David LaPell]

My truck says the same things to me when it wants to do a burnout.

 

[m657]

"Does your truck also attempt to persuade you to do inappropriate acts?"

...usually it specifies 'no photos now'......

 

[Huhwhat?]

A few more from today...

 

[wolfsong]

My truck promised better gas mileage down the road after a mountain trip. It was lying to me. Going from 500 feet altitude to 10,000 burns extra fuel. Fair enough.

The extra mileage it promised was a result of going down hill all the way home... Scamming scroundrel of a truck!

 

[exavid]

Nothing new about Jeep coercion, I get the same thing from my TJ. It was so happy with the half doors I put on her today we went up into the hills this evening and counted 39 deer with a lot of nice little bucks among them. I really need a way to divide up my garage so that the Jeep and the bikes don't talk to each other. They can get cranky if one seems to be getting more rides than another. With a jeep and three bikes in the garage it's difficult to keep them all happy. Sometimes I just need a ride on the K1100LT, sometimes I need to run an errand in town that just fits the C650GT. What's a guy to do? I ride the bikes and take the Jeep out as much as possible to keep them all happy, it's a tough life.

 

[ndcowboy]

Last night right at dark I was sitting on our deck out in the middle of nowhere when down the section line past my place comes a Jeep Wrangler with the hard top off and a couple people enjoying the evening. I looked over at my Jeep Grand Cherokee and thought to myself "My Jeep needs a Wrangler friend." Maybe next year.

 

[Number9]

IT'S A DISEASES, I TELL YA... A DISEASES!! :mrgreen:

 

[turd]

Does your (Jeep) Patriot ever talk you into leaving the road, or, as the case may be "the road less traveled"? :mrgreen:

 

[FlyerTom]

My Caravan used to talk to me. Said things like "The door is ajar" and "Rear hatch is open". The last straw was when she said "Recalculating". I killed her after that.

 

[rduchateau2954]

Sometimes mine tells me to kill the neighbors, and then I have to say "No, no. Bad Jeep."

Holy crap so does mine!! All three vehicles! It's the only thing they agree on. Sometimes they talk to me when I'm in the house too...

Maybe we do like a strangers on a train thing to appease them?

 

[stevemb]

We've had a Commanche and a Cherokee here in the past. We've been told to never come back to the Tionesta car wash. Dern Jeeps !

 

[Selena]

Sometimes mine tells me to kill the neighbors, and then I have to say "No, no. Bad Jeep."

Holy crap so does mine!! All three vehicles! It's the only thing they agree on. Sometimes they talk to me when I'm in the house too...

Maybe we do like a strangers on a train thing to appease them?

I am really starting to worry about you guys!

 

[Huhwhat?]

The dirty Jeep. Now with 50% more roof rack...

 

[m657]

I just got back from a 1000 mile road trip with mine....and it's not even built for pavement.

Last 2 tanks were 20.6 and 22.0 mpg at cross-country highway speeds, I about had a seizure.

 

[Huhwhat?]

The trip out to the work apartment, four days driving back and forth to the mine, and then the trip back home last night calculated out as 28.3 mpg.

 

[stevemb]

"When I say put a rock under the tire... I mean ROCK !" From a CW McCall song(spelling ?)

 

[Merle1948]

And just how long has your Jeep been talking to you persuading you to do inappropriate acts?

I understand completely. My Kawasaki Z1 used to do the same thing to me! But sadly, the CHP officer wouldn't accept that as an excuse. :mrgreen: The ticket was VERY expensive!

 

[coach]

Mostly my truck just says "fill me". I always obey since I don't want to walk home.

 

[gramps]

And just how long has your Jeep been talking to you persuading you to do inappropriate acts?

I understand completely. My Kawasaki Z1 used to do the same thing to me! But sadly, the CHP officer wouldn't accept that as an excuse. :mrgreen: The ticket was VERY expensive!

He caught you? You really don't know how to ride that thing!
gramps