MORE funnies

[Colonialgirl]

A friend unloaded these all on me today and I thought I'd share the laughter!! :roll: :roll: :wink: :wink: :lol:

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Husbands and Wives can NEVER Communicate


1. AVOCADOS

A wife asks her husband, "Could you please go shopping for me and buy one carton of milk and if they have avocados, get 6.

A short time later the husband comes back with 6 cartons of milk. The wife asks him, "Why did you buy 6 cartons of milk?"

He replied, "They had avocados."

If you're a woman, I'm sure you're going back to read it again! Men will get it the first time.

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2. WATER IN THE CARBURETOR

WIFE: "There is trouble with the car. It has water in the carburetor."

HUSBAND: "Water in the carburetor? That's ridiculous "

WIFE: "I tell you the car has water in the carburetor."

HUSBAND: "You don't even know what a carburetor is. I'll check it out.

Where's the car?

WIFE: "In the pool".

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3. STATISTIC

THIS IS A FRIGHTENING STATISTIC , PROBABLY ONE OF THE MOST WORRISOME IN RECENT YEARS.

25% of the women in this country are on medication for mental illness.

That's scary. It means 75% are running around untreated.

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4. HE MUST PAY

Husband and wife had a tiff. Wife called up her mom and said, "He fought with me again, I am coming to live with you."

Mom said, "No darling, he must pay for his mistake. I am coming to live with you.

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5. TODAY'S SHORT READING FROM THE BIBLE

From Genesis: "And God promised men that good and obedient wives would be found in all corners of the earth."

Then he made the earth round and He laughed and laugh

 

[gramps]

I read them to my girlfriend! We both thought they were a hoot!
gramps

 

[eveled]

That's because she's your girlfriend. If she was your wife, you'd be getting death stares, cold shoulder, and you'd be sleeping on the couch.

 

[GP100]

That's because she's your girlfriend. If she was your wife, you'd be getting death stares, cold shoulder, and you'd be sleeping on the couch.

Ain't that the truth!

 

[Merle1948]

More good ones! :mrgreen:

 

[Pal Val]

There´s a big mouse infestation in my neighborhood. Everyone setting all kinds of traps and poison. They do a lousy job of getting rid of the mice. I have none of that, and no mice running around in my house.

I legally adopted all the mice. Now, they come visit for a day or so once or twice a year.