Porch Pirates Who Mess With The Wrong Home Owners

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Conman

Bearcat
Joined
Oct 31, 2022
Messages
53
Location
Iowa
And, the law makes it illegal for homeowners to do anything!!
 
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contender

Ruger Guru
Joined
Sep 18, 2002
Messages
26,102
Location
Lake Lure NC USA
While,, so far as we know,, we haven't had any packages stolen,, we do know it's happened around our area some. We try & have ways to prevent thieves from easily seeing, or even getting to stuff here.

But if we do start having porch thieves hit us,, I can promise they will not enjoy the surprise they will get from a package I'll let them get. You see,,, I have a few sealed,, but potent jars of pure skunk "essence" at my disposal. I can guarantee that they will get a harsh & hard to remove smelly surprise. And their thievery will be on cameras.
 
Joined
Aug 1, 2022
Messages
2,433
Location
Communist Paradise of NY
My niece used to be in a wine of the month club. She had a couple of her wine deliveries stolen.... I told her that I would take care of it for her. She knew which day it was supposed to be delivered and I told her to put a hold on the package. I filled a bottle with asparagus laden whiz..... I bet their next drink was mouthwash!
 

HumphreyDaBear

Bearcat
Joined
Jun 9, 2024
Messages
68
Location
Hoosierville
I live in a quiet, low crime area thankfully because…one time I ordered some gun powder online and the delivery service left it on my front porch and never tried to make contact, I was in the back yard at the time of delivery. Worse yet, this was a delivery that required a signature for acceptance. The delivery person forged my signature. I contacted the delivery service to inquire about the delivery/forged signature. They said it was common for their drivers to do this to make delivery times more efficient. I pointed out what if kids would have grabbed this material? They just didn't seem to care. Filed a complaint and contacted the authorities about it, nothing happened. Money talks, our rights walk. Never ordered powder online or used this delivery service again. I don't blame the online suppler, they followed the law.
 

woodsy

Blackhawk
Joined
Jan 5, 2012
Messages
985
Location
Seymour, CT
Did you catch the pair of pirates on TV, who were fighting over who would get the goods? Any closer to each other and one would have been on the ground. Threw stuff around, then both quickly left. They actually follow FedEx trucks around.
 

gnappi

Blackhawk
Joined
Jul 4, 2023
Messages
646
Location
Florida
Despite having a bit of walking traffic other than mango thieves i have not had a package taken off my porch.

However 15 years ago three punks went up and down the street stealing mail and packages from mailboxes and they were caught. Their slimy legal counsel claimed they found it all in the street and were going to deliver it.

But... the local PD has more than once asked me if I would check my video system.

A local PD officer asked me to check my drives and I told him I already had a DVD made of them stealing from my mailbox. The thing is if you did not KNOW the kids the vid was not good enough to ID them but one look at the video surveillance by their attorney and he could tell it WAS his clients.

They were all charged with felonies.
 
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contender

Ruger Guru
Joined
Sep 18, 2002
Messages
26,102
Location
Lake Lure NC USA
While I think his approach is funny,, he's educating the thieves about his package. They will learn to leave it alone.

It's much better to totally surprise them.
 

Killer Bee

Bearcat
Joined
Dec 27, 2011
Messages
72
don't give thieves too much credit - he's got a LOT of them ;)

see his videos on car thieves :D
 

TINCANBANDIT is back

Single-Sixer
Joined
Dec 2, 2023
Messages
154
Location
Arizona's Redneck Riviera
when the people we hire to protect our rights, fail to protect our rights, the end result will be vigilante violence, and those who take matter into their own hands shall not be blamed...those who failed to uphold the law will be to blame.....
 
Joined
Apr 4, 2009
Messages
6,461
Location
China Spring TX
We know an old farmer(yes, never mess with farmers!) that got hit twice, so he got an Amazon box, put in some grass, twigs and dirt and caught a copperhead and put it in as a surprise. They swiped that box and never returned. I can imagine the thieves calling the cops to report they trespassed onto land, busted a gate and complain that someone left them a booby trap. The farmer had a response if needed that he was going to take the box and release the snake in a field but someone stole it before he could free the poor critter...try to prove his claim to be wrong.
 
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