Welcome to the Forum.
As an instructor for the NRA Women On Target program,, and my wonderful better half being the head of our WOT clinics etc,, I've instructed a LOT of ladies when it comes to shooting. In fact,, Miss Penny was invited to NRA HQ last weekend to be part of a ladies only focus group to discuss ladies & shooting. She is considered to be one of the top 10 female instructors in the country.
All that aside,, let me tell you what I tell ALL ladies.
First,, do NOT let a man decide what you want. Find what fits YOUR hands,, and YOU can shoot & operate comfortably. Generally, casual lady shooters find the semi's a bit heavier in recoil, harder to operate,, and are uncomfortable in the general operation of them. (I'm talking about the OCCASIONAL lady shooter.) So,, for simplicity,, we usually suggest a good quality double action revolver,, preferrably a 357 in caliber, with a set of grips that fit HER hands. Why a DA revolver? Simple to operate, and almost infallible. Why a 357? Because you have MORE choices of ammo available. (38 shorts, 38 spls, 357 mags.)
Once most ladies realize that all that makes sense, it comes down to the "great debate." Lightweight vs heavier handguns. The lighter the handgun,, the sharper the recoil. The heavier the gun,, the lighter the recoil. Physics.
A person should practice on a regular basis to be comfortable with a home defense firearm,, so most prefer a good solid heavier shooter model. Yet,, once many of them start carrying,, they complain about the weight. It's a trade off,, and only THEY can decide what works best for them.
The SP-101 is an excellent firearm,,, with it's weight the only issue. The LCR is also a great lightweight,, but several ladies think it kicks too much. The S&W lightweight DA's have more felt recoil than most,, due to several little things.
So,, have your wife study & shoot (if possible) several guns to decide what she likes. And remember,, grip panels CAN be swapped out making all the difference in the world!