'CALLSHOTS' CHICK MAGNET

[Jeff Hoover]

Steve(callshot), has discovered the volatile combination of Hai Karate' after shave lotion and a rugged Woolrich plaid vest. Despite having a noticeable limp from a longer leg, missing trigger finger, bad back, and having a glass eye, whenever he wears the two above items together, lookout ! Chick magnet. The female sex just can't resist. They are mesmorized by the manly looking duds, and the intoxicating aroma of Hai Karate cologne . Pure testosterone !

When wearing this vest, Steve tells the flocking damsels he's a retired lumberjack, who still swings a mean double bit axe ! Topped off with the Hai Karate', instant chick magnet !

Here's Steve(callshot) with two of his biggest fans. They wrestled 13 other women , to win Steve's affection, in his favorte pancake restaurant. This is a good picture of Steve, as both eyes(you can't hardly tell the real from the glass ) are looking in the same direction, and his missing finger is covered by one of his fans. Steve is fond of his red/black buffalo plaid vest, for when he dribbles huckleberry syrup on it, while eating flapjacks, it blends right in . The way Steve's head is turned, you can't see his ear ring in his left ear, or pony tail :shock: . That's another story ! Or the time his prosthetic trigger finger fell into a pile of link sausage at the church breakfast..........

 

[callshot]

Thanks Jeff for the words of encouragement & inspiration! Thanks for the vest but you will have to get your own Hai Karate. For you I would try WD-40. I have three things to say to you at this time...

Kiss my red S

Read between the carrots

This is the end of the line for you buddy!

I would never throw any digs or barbs at you on days that end in 'y' because it is "be kind to illiterate cop week" out here. If I need to, I can have Betty come out and straighten you out!
Steve can't shoot

 

[moisha]

My goodness, Callshot. One of those Chicks bears and odd resemblance to our second daughter . The other one looks much like her employee at that famous pancake house! I wonder how that could be :-\. Do you have any possible suggestions??

 

[2 dogs]

I dont know, Ole Jeff can sure call em'. Ole Cantshoot is lookin' pretty good to me....Kinda got that "Candy little girl?" look on his face dont he....

 

[callshot]

Your correct moisha. That is your and my second daughter and one of her employees at the pancake house. Both are good looking. :lol: I am not too sure about the one in the middle :?: When I get real brave, I am going to try some Brute Cologne. 8) I will at least know if all they are after is my money or if the vest and cologne really work. :shock: I would at the least, like to prove Jeff Hoover wrong at something if I can. :wink: Steve

 

[dougader]

Go for the Stetson cologne, Steve. But I warn you, you'll need to carry yer 6 gun 24/7 to keep the wimmin folk from swarmin ya.

 

[contender]

Y'all are both so "wrong",, it's funny!

That red plaid wool was so out of place in Idaho in November,, that 6 burly cowboys stopped Jeff to see if they could help a yankee find his way OUT of the state. And nobody knows how easy it was for Jeff to kill his elk cow. The cow had never seen such stuff, that she died of fright,, !

 

[callshot]

Tyrone, I don't mind being wrong. I am wrong so often the the post office gave me my own zip code, because I live in a constant state of wrong. I am occasionally funny ( in my own world. I am pretty comfortable in it now all by myself.) I wouldn't dare try Stetson cologne, because I can't stand too much rejection from women kind. We do need more wool vests now. The global de-warming has homesteaded on my front porch. I haven't seen them 6 cowboys. They must be in Arizona for the winter. I think Jeff got the vests in an Army Surplus store in Scotland. :lol: Betty (moisha) said that neither the vest or the cologne would help me out as far as she was concerned. Maybe I'll just keep on using cod liver oil mixed with garlic juice. I do like the vest and wear it when I have my bib overhauls in the creek for laundry day. Right now the creek is frozen over and the bibs are getting ripe. I hope to get them fixed up before the spring crop of chicks start to emerge from their igloos.

 

[sixshot]

There ain't any chicks coming out of their igloos, maybe one or two from the reservation, I heard Sitting Bull's daughter was interested (Squatting Heifer) Maybe rub a little buffalo tallow in your hair & some beaver musk under your armpits, if that doesn't attract a lady maybe one of the mountain men will show up! :lol:

Dick

 

[Jeff Hoover]

Steve(callshot), Thanks for the explanation on the pillow case. I see that there are pink "S's" on the case also, to cover both shades of Rosey, or pink "S". That carrot is just plain obscene :roll: . I'm sure it would bring top dollar in a farmers market in San Francisco :shock: . That picture of the train tracks is classic ! If the end of the line is in Idaho, I'm all aboard !

moisha, that lovely lady obviosly got her looks from you ! Glad to see she has both eyes, all her fingers, straight back, and is not leaning to one side, as both legs are the same length Beautifull girl !

2dogs, callshot has a more 'caught with his hand in the cookie jar' look ! If he had any candy, he probably ate it !

Steve, when I think of Brute cologne, I think of Joe Namath. When I think of Joe Namath, I think of that pantyhose commercial he did. I'm having a difficult time thinking of you in pantyhose, your leopard skin thong, with matching "Bush" hat . Then again, if you wore that "outfit" in San Francisco , you could probably sell a truck load of those three sided carrots .

dougader, the only thing swarming callshot would be bees. It's the reason he gave up being a bee keeper.

Tyrone, those 6 cowboys were inquiring where they could pick up such fancy duds. As to the cow elk dying so quickly, it wasn't fright, she laughed herself to death. :lol:

Dick, I thought callshot already used buffalo tallow and beaver musk. I was wondering why all the cats and dogs in the neighborhood followed him around

 

[callshot]

Thanks for all the advice? ( abuse ) Please don't make fun of moisha's legs. I am a little bow legged and she is some knock kneed. When we got married and stood side by side we spelled "OX". Moose grease is a little tame for me. I prefer badger sweat and sauerkraut juice. :roll: A couple of neighbor ladies stopped by today to give me some genuine, helpful hints for the spring crop of chicks, but I don't have that many years to wait for their daughters to grow up. Knowing me as well as they do, they can't understand all the abuse I get on here. :!: You all understand that all the things said here about me is going into my articles in sports magazines and on FIX news right after Glen Broke. I'll be signing autographs after for $1.398 each or you can get them on the Disturbed Channel. 8) Steve

 

[contender]

Now we know you are stretching things too far. Sixshot wouldn't allow you to go hunting with him if he got even a whif of sauerkraut juice. Or,,, maybe the badger sweat overpowers the kraut & since we all know how much sixshot loves to go after any old badger,,, maybe it's ok,,?
I know that cats love that perfume,, but dogs just cock their legs,,,!

 

[lovemyruger2010]

haha you guys are crazy!

 

[contender]

You should have seen us when we were all together,,,!

 

[lovemyruger2010]

Let me get this right! You all know each other outside the forum?

 

[contender]

Yep,, sixshot invited Jeff, Zeus, & myself to join him in Idaho last Nov for a cow elk shoot. Of course we met callshot,, eer,,, can'tshoot, and middleshot, & enjoyed several days of good food (thanks again Ruth-Ann) along with daily bull sessions,,, a few days at a range,, and even a side trip or two. Yep,, we do know each other,,,!

 

[Jeff Hoover]

This is actually a reunion picture from the Greater Idaho Psychiatric Institute. We were so crazy, they thought we were sane. We all graduated with honors, except 'callshot'. They wanted to study his brain more, but 'callshot' wanted to go home. A simple frontal lobotomy removed the organ in question, and 'callshot' got his wish, and left. A crazy good time was had by all !

 

[callshot]

Nice job photo shopping all those pictures that you got off the Post Office wall. Now I know where the scar on my head came from. When I came tooo I was told that it was from the gun fight re-enactment at badger point that was being filmed for the Jerry Lewis telethon this year. Even with all my deformities, the chicks are still swarming. It must be the smell of the cobblers. Steve

 

[2 dogs]

Somewhere somehow some poor baboon who participated in a frontal labotomy exchange is wondering why the hell he all of a sudden loves huckleberrys so much......

 

[callshot]

HUCKLEBERRIES, HUCKLEBERRIES, Where? Since the exchange I haven't been interested in them. I do have a hankering for some DINGLEBERRIES. I tried some Strawberries, but the straw kept getting caught in my tooth. I tried some Hawberries once and couldn't stop laughing. :lol: When I ate some Chokecherries back in the early 40's I almost choked to death. I haven't tried any Blackberries yet. I think that some Razzberries will be next on my list to try. I heard that Bearberries are good, but hard to catch and release. Sixshot would know. I did have a couple of Cackleberries for breakfast this morning. I haven't had any huckleberies since last Saturday. I understand there are quite a few Dingleberries on this forum. If this is true, I hope they all have a good day. Steve